Hope
Thinking: too many things ... not enough time to think
Listening to: Star 94 (
it's going to be weird when I'm actually listening to something else)
I'm Excited About: Spirit week, the homecoming game, the homecoming dance, the fact that we have actually won three games in a row for the first time in Chestatee history, parties to come in journalism, being able to feature my cute lil' sophomore couple in the homecoming dance layout, seeing everybody after a four day weekend...
I Fear: My human anatomy test, everything that will continue to be thrown at me in human anatomy, the paper that I have to write for AP Lit about a book that I don't even understand, tripping and falling at homecoming, falling in the yearbook room again and having Heather continue to mock my clutziness...
Word I Just Thought of: SquishHollywood News: There is hope! Chad Michael Murray and Sophia Bush have separated!
Hey guyz! Well, I came home after school on Friday, and I got a call from my best friend saying, "
Jen, we don't have school Monday or Tuesday!" So I then wondered if I was dreaming. Apparently luck is on the side of teenagers lately, because once I turned on the news, they were showing all of the school closings. All students in the state of Georiga got Monday and Tuesday of this week off because the government wanted to save the gas that is used by buses. Now, as you can probably assume, this has caused a huge rucus around Georiga. This lady came on the radio and stated, "
I think that teenagers should just not be allowed to drive to school." Of course, I then started screaming, "
Get her off the air!" From my personal view, I honestly don't care.
I got off of school; I'm happy. I know that might sound bad, but I think that's how all teenagers feel about it. I needed the extra time to study anyway. The only bad thing is that it's Tuesday, and well, I haven't really studied yet. But I will ... I promise.
This weekend has been awesome. I haven't had so much to do in a long time, and well, it's nice having a life. Saturday I went shopping with my grandmother, and I found a cute purse and some hair clips for homecoming. This is the first year that I'm actually going to attempt to style my hair on my own. If you know me well, you're probably laughing right now. You see, my hair is extremely long. I've been growing it out for locks of love, and I don't want to cut it until after graduation because I'm scared that I won't like the way it looks. Anyway, there is no way that I'm actually going to attempt to put my hair up in some fancy way, so I'm just going to put it half up. If that doesn't work, I'll just leave it down. I didn't think homecoming was going to end up being what it is this year, and so I figured that I'd save the money that I would have spent on getting my hair done. I didn't think I had to worry about "looking good" this year because the only reason I was going to homecoming was because I wanted to since it's my senior year. Well, now that's kind of changed ...
I'll keep ya guessing! :)I'm sure all of you really wanted to know that much information about my hair! lol Anyway, I also went to my friend's birthday party Saturday, and it was a lot of fun. Then Sunday I had the much-awaited dinner with my co-workers. It was fun, but I do miss all of them. It was nice being able to hang out with Adam again, and guess what?
I hugged Scott! It has been a goal of mine to give Scott a hug for the longest time now, and I finally did it! He reached out his hand to shake mine, and I was like, "
Oh, come here Scott!" Now I'm just hoping that I still have my job...
Yesterday I took my friend Rachael dress shopping for homecoming, and we found two really nice dresses that looked amazing on her. Unfortunately, she didn't have any money, but her and her mom were going to go back and look at them.
I'm so excited that Rachael is going. It feels like it was just a week or two ago when I felt like I only had two friends that were actually going to go to the dance. Now Heather has a boyfriend, which totally came out of the blue, and so she's going, and then I talked Rachael into going at her birthday party. If only I could talk Cindy into it...
I also went to see
Flight Plan yesterday, which will come in handy because I can write a review on it for the school newspaper. I thought it was pretty good. Halfway through it you start thinking, "
This is kind of dumb; it's just about a lady who goes insane," but it's not. The way it ends it pretty cool. I didn't expect it, which says a lot, because I'm usually good at figuring out where the writer's are going with the plot. I predicted what was going to happen in one of my grandmother's TV shows once, and I was right.
I think it's a writer's instinct. This Saturday is the homecoming dance, and as you can probably tell by now, I'm really excited. For one thing, I get to feature this cute little sophomore couple as the main focus in the layout for yearbook. This means that I actually have to go to the guy's (
Chad) house, and take pictures of him getting ready for the dance. Don't worry, it's just going to be simple pictures like him looking in the mirror or buttoning his shirt. Nothing weird or bad.
I just hope that his parents will let me in! I'm also excited because I have a pretty cool date. It's weird how things work out. I'm a firm believer in everything happens for a reason, and it really seems like things have been adding up for the good for me lately. I'm glad that I'm going with the person that I'm going with.
:) Life is good. Maybe I'm just saying that because I've been lucky to have a four day weekened. Maybe it's because for the first time in a long time I'm actually smiling and laughing again. Or maybe it's because things are finally
different. Either way, I'm enjoying the adventure.
-JKM - OUT!P.S. Kevin's coming down here in less than in two weeks!
Breathe
Thinking: I'm drowning in notebooks! Too much work!
Listening to: Star 94 (
when am I not?)
Looking Forward to: Next Saturday, Rachael's birthday party, getting my pay check, finding a mask that's the right color for my dress (
the theme for homecoming is masquerade), seeing Cindy (
I haven't been able to talk to her all weekend), visiting work, visiting Adam, seeing Martha eventually someday, seeing Kevin in three weeks...
Not Looking Forward to: School, work, human anatomy, yearbook drama, new newspaper article assignments, bad music on the radio, gas prices...
Reading: Things Fall Apart By: Chinua Achebe and
Just Like Heaven By: Marc Levy
Writing: What seems like a million newspaper articles, two sets of homecoming copy for yearbook and something new and different of my own that doesn't have a name yet.
I REALLY Need: A new notebook, gum, a mask, to go to Khols and three pennies...
Word I Just Thought of: Cougar Inhale: Next week is spirit week! I need camo and a college shirt, and I have no clue how to dress up for 80's day ... help me out here people...
Exhale: I'm finished with my articles for newspaper, and I don't have to worry about writing anything for yearbook until after homecoming. Yay!
Hey guyz!
We actually won the football game Friday, and of course I didn't go. Maybe I'm bad luck for the team or something because it seems like every game that I don't go to, we win. I really hope we win the homecoming game though because
one, we never have,
two, I'm going to be there doing my normal Chloe Sullivan/Veronica Mars thing, and
three, it would be really awesome.
You know what bugs me? People who just flat out don't care. People who are lazy. People who don't get excited about life. You can't sit around your entire life and be a bump on a log. Do something! I hate it when lazy people end up getting the best jobs just because they're smart at one thing. Then they just slide on by throughout their entire life without caring or really doing anything because guess what? They don't have to. They have a job that pays them enough money. They don't have to dream about a career or really wanting something. They have everything they need and everything to them is just the power of being lazy. That wasn't really directed at anyone imperticular. Well, maybe just a little. I guess I just had to put my feelings out there. That would be a really good article for my opinion column for the newspaper though.
I'm not even sure if I metioned that on here.
I got my own column in my school's newspaper. I'm really excited about it, but at the same time, it does mean more work. I don't really like that part of it, but oh well. During this weekened I have had to write four articles for newspaper, and I got extremely stressed out. I usually only do one or two, but for some reason, I got assigned to a lot this week, and believe me,
I will never let that happen again. I'm the type of person that gets so frustrated with writing sometimes that my brain just shuts off, and there's no way that I'll get anything accomplished. Usually if I go and do something else for a while and then come back to my work, I can get things done. I had to write a review on the movie
Just Like Heaven yesterday, and if you haven't seen that movie yet, go for it. It was awesome. It's the perfect date movie. My friend even told me that her boyfriend cried during it! I personally loved it. I also had to write a review on the new TV show
Supernatural. Anything with Jared Padalecki is good to me, but don't worry, I wrote a fair review. I liked the show, which says a lot because I'm not really fond of scary things. Lets see, then I had to write an article on the best colleges in the US and Georgia. That was not fun. I hated having to do the research, and frankly, I'm just glad it's over with. Last but not least, I wrote my column "Stepping Stones," and by this time, I was so tired of writing that I didn't think it would turn out any good. I think it's okay though. We'll see.
I'm not sure if there's anything big happening this week. I have to go by work at some point to get my pay check. I really want to see Jer, and I need to tell Scott to take Katie to see
Just Like Heaven.
I miss work. I was at the mall of Georgia yesterday, and I had to walk by shoe boxes, and it made me sad! I'm glad that I get to go back. This Saturday is my friend Rachael's birthday. She's lucky enough to have her party at the Civic Center. That should be interesting. I also need to get my spirit week apparel before next week. I've never really gotten into the whole spirit week phenomenon, but I figured that since it's my senior year, I might as well. I also need to find a brown mask for homecoming. Every year until now the theme for homecoming has been something simple that you don't really have to dress up in a particular way for. Well, this year, (
my senior year of course) they choose the theme "masquerade" so I have to find a mask to match my dress.
I think homecoming's going to be pretty funny because I can just picture all of the guys looking like zoro in the end. That would be hilarious.
I love Autumn. Seriously. I know that was random, but it's true. Out of all of the seasons, Autumn is my favorite. Winter is too cold, in the Spring I have alergies, and in the Summer it's too hot. Autumn makes me want to go to a park or something. Anyone want to come with me?
;)-JKM - OUT!
Light
Thinking: I'm free!
Listening to: Star 94
Shout Out: Rachael ... Happy Sweet 16 Chica! I luv ya! (...
tomorrow)
You've Gotta Try: Trident Sweet and Sour Strawberry Gum ... I love it!
You've Gotta Watch: The season premiere of
Gilmore Girls ... I hope Luke says yes!
Word I Just Thought of: Luppy ... but I don't think that's even a word
Spotlight: Today's my first day that I won't be working at Factory Brand Shoes for two months, I have a huge human anatomy test tomorrow that's going to take me all day to study for, the
War Eagles won their first (
and probably only) game of the season Friday, and of course I didn't go because it was all the way in Gilmer...
Lime Light: There was hardly anyone at the outlet mall yesterday so Jer called Scott and told him that he didn't have to come into work until five o'clock, I parked in a different spot for the first time since I started working there, I got invited to watch the UGA football game with like five guys who are all at least three years older than me, I got off work at seven but didn't get home until eight, and there was exactly half of a moon in the sky when I was driving home...
Dim Light: I hope that my video for AP Lit went well considering that I wasn't there on Friday to present it with my group, and I hope I don't get points counted off because I wasn't there, Kryssee actually re-created my first day of school layout that was lost in yearbook, I hate human anatmony, and I really don't want to school tomorrow ...
eeerrr ... this whole week...
Hey guyz! Yesterday really made me think about life and change and how I want to be remembered by people. I took a good look around me before I left work yesterday because
one, I know I won't be back for a while, and
two,
I want to be able to remember all of the good times that I had there.
During the summer work was amazing, and believe it or not, but this past summer might have just been my best summer ever because of work. Even all of my friends have gotten attached to some of the people I work with! Yesterday was actually a lot of fun. I bought Patti some hand sanitizer (
trust me, you need it when you work at a shoe store!), and Jer loved how it smelled like vanilla. Then Scott came in and it was hilarious to see the way his nose went up when he opened the cap to it. Scott asked me if I was going to come back and visit before Thanksgiving, and I was like, "
Of course Scott, I have to come back and get my last pay check!"
It was funny. When I was walking out of the store I thought that I better get used to leaving people, or I'm going to be a mess come May. Of course, I really think I'm going to be a mess in May no matter what. One of my best friends is an underclassman, and so it's going to be extremely hard to leave her. It'll be sad to leave Mrs. Boggs and Coach Haight, and I don't know what I'll do without Coach Warren. I must say that it was definitely harder to leave middle school because of the teachers than it is to leave high school. I loved all of my 8th grade teachers, and I, being a complete nerd, still go back and visit them every now and then. It actually came in handy going to the middle school open house this year though, because I went and talked to one of my 7th grade teachers, and it turns out the she went to Brenau University. So, pretty soon we're going to take a trip (
yeah, Brenau's only like fifteen minutes away) there and talk to the admissions counselor about scholarships. Yep, it's really helpful when one of your past teachers is best friends with your admissions counselor.
:) Anyway, I'm getting off topic here. After work, I went and saw Cindy at her job (
she only works an ile away from me), and then I went and saw an old friend, that I haven't really gotten to talk to in like two years, at her job. We couldn't believe that we've been working at the same place for almost the same amount of time and haven't bumped into each other. This girl has changed completely since I saw her last. Her parents decided to move because they thought that my school was a bad influence on her. Apparently, they were wrong. She's still a great girl and everything, but some of the things that she does now because of the school that she's at, I don't think she would have ever done if she stayed at Chestatee. It's only been two years, and it's like she's a completely different person.
I've never been the type to change because of my surroundings, but I hope that when I bump into people that I've known throughout high school two years from now, I'll be basically the same as I am now.
Sure, smarter, prettier and more outgoing would be nice, but
as far as life-alterning changes go, I'd rather not have any. It's a scary thought wondering about change and how it's going to effect people after high school. I had a dream last night that I ended up working for a newspaper in North Carolina, and I lived in a tiny appartment with my dog. I can see that happening, and it doesn't make me sad or anything. I know that it's going to take me a while before I can actually live comfortably. That's the price you pay when you want to be a writer. I guess even if I'm poor and struggling, I hope that I'll be happy, proud of myself and still have dreams. I don't think that will ever cease.
Everyone who knows me knows that I'm a dreamer. I guess I owe that to my parents. You know, it's amazing how many people stirve to be someone in life because of how their parents lived their lives. I found out just yesterday that my boss feels the same way about that as I do. I like being that type of person though. I believe that if you have something inside of you that makes you want to be someone and achieve your goals ... a passion of some sort ... you'll achieve it no matter how long it takes.
Anyway, that's all for now. Cherish the time with your friends while you have it, and pray that I do well on my human anatomy test!!!
-JKM-OUT!
Steps
Thinking: Tomorrow's my last day at work ... that is ... until the day after Thanksgiving
Listening to: 3 Doors Down
Lyrics At The Moment: They gave me a life that's not so easy to live...Staring at: Human Anatomy journal (yeah, there's a journal
and a notebook)
Highlight of My Day: Riding the bus with Heather and Rachael to Emory
Why Rachael Made Me Laugh Today (this will end up being a regular): We had to walk out of the building that we ate lunch in at Emory, and the doors were those sliding ones that you have to walk in and push forward in order to get out. Well, Rachael walks in and starts pushing on the door, but she's pushing the wrong side, in the wrong direction. It was hilarious. I was like, "No Rachael, you have to go this way." So she turned around, held her head down and hoped that no one saw her. I laughed all the way back to the main building.
Morning Tales: Cindy woke me up last night by sending me a text message at one o'clock in the morning, and then I had to get up at six in order to get at the school by 7:15. I was then totally freaked out when driving to school this morning because it was 7:13, and I got stuck behind a bus. Luckily I made it in time.
My Personal Evaluation of Emory University: The campus is beautiful, and they have a great cafeteria selection. The people are really nice, and they seem totally cool, but maybe that's just because they're college students, and I'm only a small senior who thinks they're cool just because of the fact that they don't have to go to prison everyday like me. There are some really hot guys (
yeah, that one's for you Bekah) and the classrooms are a comforable size. It also seemed really diverse to me, which is a good thing. Now all I need is a 1300 on the SAT (
the old version) and $40,000 per year, and I'll be in!
Hey guyz! Yeah, I know, I might as well write everything that I have to say in my random beginnings, but that wouldn't be any fun. I'll tell you what was fun though. Not going to school today ... that was awesome. I wish I could go on a field trip away from school every Friday, but I guess that's not possible.
Emory University was beautiful. Of course, we got there really late, and we all had to look stupid walking into the classes, but overall, it was a lot of fun. I didn't really enjoy the journalistic perspective of it too much, which I guess is a bad thing considering that that's why I went there, but learning about and
seeing what college life is like was an eye opening experience for me. Heather and Rachael kept telling me, "
Jennifer, this is going to be you next year. You're going to be in college." And I was just standing there thinking, "
Wow, I'm going to be in college!" It's a scary yet extremely exciting feeling. It's weird knowing that I'm almost there. It's almost as if with everything that I'm doing right now to prepare for it, I'm taking a step closer to it. Now that's scary. I really hope that I'm going to be able to handle it all, and I hope that I can make friends. I'm the only one out of my small group of friends who is branching out and going to a school that no one they know is going to. I'm a little scared that I'm going to be a loner, and I'm really really scared that I'm not going to meet any guys. Of course, this comes from talking to Adam today who apparently recently met a girl from Brenau who told him that it was really hard for her to meet guys. Oh well, I guess that's when having friends that go to co-ed schools will come in handy.
Tomorrow's my last day at work. I just wrote an entire paragraph about everything that's been going on at FBS, but I decided to delete it because I feel like I was sharing too much. I don't like talking bad about people, and I definitely don't want to do it on here. Speaking of talking bad about people,
yearbook is insane. I have no clue what is going on, and I'm just praying that in the end we're going to have an amazing yearbook.
I'm not the assistant editor. The assistant edtior would actually be able to do something. The assistant editor would actually be able to get on the computer without being told to get off one second later, and the assistant editor would have some say so in things.
It sucks. I hope by the end of this year I can stand up to Jessica because she truly deserves it. I don't understand why she doesn't trust me to do things. I was on the computer the other day, and she came over and was like, "
Jennifer, what are you doing?" So I told her I was putting in captions for my layout, and she was like, "
Well, can't Kaylan do that?" Sure, Kaylan is the "layout person" for my "group" but Cindy and I wrote the captions, and Kaylan asked me to put them in the layout. Besides why does it matter who puts the captions in? Does she really think that I'm going to screw up the layout by putting captions in? I'm sorry, that's enough gossip, but it really makes me mad.
I'm not stupid. I've been in yearbook before, and guess what? I've done plenty of layouts. Jessica just acts like it's my first day in yearbook every single day, and I'm really getting sick of it. Now if only I could trigger this anger to explode at the right moment...
I have a
HUGE human anatomy test Monday, and I haven't studied yet. The good thing is that they didn't have a quiz while I was gone today so I don't have to come in and make that up on Monday. See, I have that whole overruling the bad thing going on again.
I love it! Mrs. Boggs works as a freelance writer for
The Times, and I had the chance to talk to her about it today, and well, it scared me. You don't get paid much per article, but maybe (
hopefully) that's just when you're a freelancer. I really want to write. Wait, let me rephrase that, I
know that I'm going to write, but at the same time, I really hope that I'm not going to end up living pay check to pay check.
Anyway, I'm probably going to miss going to my job after tomorrow, but two months to figure everything about college out and to study will really help. Just having the time to think will help. Plus, I'll be working for Mrs. Boggs in no time. I really hope I'm good at raking leaves...
-JKM - OUT!
Whisper
Thinking: It's nice knowing that I don't really have to go to school tomorrow...
Listening to: Dixie Chicks
FlyWhat's On Jen's TV: Gilmore Girls repeats (the
really old ones)
Word I JUST Thought of : Shoe
Reason to Smile: I'm doing good in all of my classes (
surprise), my language arts teacher really likes me for some reason, I don't have to go to school tomorrow, I finally got everything with work figured out, I found a beautiful homecoming dress and I might just have a date to go along with it, I have awesome friends, I had McDonald's today...
Reason to Laugh: Rachael ... that explains it all
Reason to Cry: Saturday's my last day at work (
kinda), I'm listening to country music, they lost my first day of school layout in yearbook, did I mention that Saturday is my last day at work?
Hey guyz! I'm not really sure if anyone ever truly understands my randomness at the beginning of every blog, but it really helps me put all of my thoughts "out there" so trust me, I do it for a good reason. This week has been extremely odd. Not that every week isn't extremely odd, but this one has an extra odd twist to it. For some reason I've been getting hit with the worst luck, but then something always happens to make up for it. Well,
almost always. Today we had a pop quiz in human anatomy, and so I sat there thinking, "Good, I won't have to make up a quiz tomorrow since I'm going to not be here," and then Mrs. Veatch goes, "We're also going to have another quiz tomorrow over everything new we learn today."
Now that is a double case of bad luck. Of course, I am going to be gone tomorrow, but I will have to come in early Monday morning to make up the quiz.
By now you're probably wondering what I'm doing tomorrow that is going to keep me from attending prison ...
eerr ... school. The newspaper staff is taking a field trip to Emory University for a journalism convention. Considing that this is what I hope to do with my life (
yes, I'm going to be poor .. thanks Adam for reminding me of this constantly), I'm actually pretty excited about it. Everyone who knows me well knows that
I'm one of those weirdos who don't like to miss school on acount of having to make up the work that is missed, so
this is a big deal. Of course, I only had to worry about getting my work from human anatomy and AP lit, so that wasn't too bad. The only bad part about tomorrow is that I have to wake up
really earily because I have to be at the school around 7:15. See, here we go again.
That's an example of bad luck. Then you have to take into consideration that I only live three minutes away from my school. That's an example of something good making up for the bad luck. I love this whole overruling thing. It's a lot better than just having to deal with the bad luck.
I'm sure all of you know that I've been struggling with my decision to quit my job. Well, as you all also know
I am the worst at decision making. Last year it took me forever just to figure out whether I wanted to purchase a school ring or not, and thanks to a very helpful fellow blogger, I decided not to. This ended up being the right decision (
for me at least) because for one thing, I'm currently wearing two rings that mean more to me than any high school ring would, and for another, I haven't really seen many people wearing theirs. I might end up getting a college ring, only because I think that will truly mean something to me and be more symbolic.
Anyway, I'm getting off subject here. My point is that although it takes me an extremely long time to make decisions, it's just because I'm trying to make the right one. I'll be honest though, usually I don't.
I'm one of those southern girls who can't make any of the right decisions so I try all of the wrong ones instead, and I'm proud of it.
It's part of my charm. Of course, I do love it when I make the right decision, which is why I have been worrying (
yes, I worry) about what to do with my whole job issue. I couldn't really talk to my grandmother about this because I knew that she would just tell me to quit and remain jobless forever, and I couldn't talk to my best friend either because frankly, I think she was getting annoyed by hearing about it. To her, I had already put in my two weeks notice and so there was nothing else to discuss. To me, on the other hand, I had put in my two weeks notice, but I still really didn't want to leave so there was a ton of things left to discuss. I couldn't really make up my mind on my own though. I do need the time to study and figure everything out about college, but at the same time, I know that I'm going to want a job after Thanksgiving. Why in the world should I quit a great job that I have now with a boss that actually really likes me when I'm just going to want another job in two months? This made no sense to me, and it was my biggest dilemma, so I e-mailed my yearbook teacher. Yes, I probably sound like the biggest geek in the world for this, but I asked my yearbook teacher for advice.
This ended up being the best decision that I have made in a while. She told me that if my boss likes me as much as I think he does, he would let me come back after Thanksgiving and just take the next two months to concentrate on school. She also said that until I return to
Factory Brand Shoes I can work for her earning $8 an hour doing chores around her house like organzing and raking leaves. Apparently some students did this last year for her as well. Anway, so this all happened on Tuesday, and I was extremely excited because I had everything figured out, and all that I had to do was go and talk to my boss about coming back after Thanksgiving.
-JKM-OUT!
Ghost
Thinking: I feel like I'm visiting an old home...
Listening to: Star 94 (
my radio station)
Staring At: My agenda (for the first time this school year)
The Old: Work is no longer a good thing, Human Anatomy has replaced Chemistry, that silent issue only took 3 months to deal with, and did I ever mention that I got accepted to Brenau???
The New: Being Assistant Editor of the yearbook doesn't
really mean being assistant editor...
The Borrowed: Cindy got a job at BCBG, Adam quit FBS, Megan and I are closer than before, cheerleaders really aren't that bad after all, and Heather and I share opinions on yearbook...
The Blue: School is tough, but that's normal, I'm having to make adult decisions that I'm not sure I'm ready for, people are leaving ... it's hard to see them go ... I'm not good with good-byes...
HEY GUYS! Wow! I wasn't sure when I would be back here, but frankly, I'm glad to be back. I'm the type of person who has to put her opinion out there somehow, and since I'm apparently "shy" and "quiet" (
we'll get into that later) I'll just have to say everything that I have to say on here. Now all I have to do is figure out where I should begin my tale...
Senior year is anything but what I expected it to be, and I'm not sure if that's a good or bad thing yet. I've been placed in many adult situations lately, and I've had to make plenty of difficult decisions. I can honestly say that I have never been good at decision making. I'm the type of person that will go back and forth and then wind up making the wrong decision in the end. I guess it's good to make the wrong decision sometimes. Sometimes the outcome is actually worth it; I love it when that happens.
I feel like I've been learning a lot of little life lessons lately that are making me grow as a person. Everything from what has happened with Katrina, to the drama that presents itself to me everyday in yearbook, has made me stop and think about who I am, who I want to be and what I want to be remembered for.
It's nice having the chance to just think. It really makes you happier.
Everything bad that has been happening to me lately has had a good effect. I wish all bad things could come with good lessons, but I guess sometimes it just doesn't work that way. I've had problems putting myself out there in yearbook, which has to do with me being too "shy" and instead of standing up to those who put me down,
I've let my emotions get to me. Everyone keeps telling me that I need to stand up for myself and give those who deserve to be yelled at a good scream, but it's hard to even consider doing that when you're like me. I'm calm by nature, and I let things slide on by even if they bug me to death. I shouldn't be like this. I shouldn't let them run the yearbook like they are, but I think it's up to me to figure out how to stand up for myself. People can tell me to do it, and they can tell me how to do it, but I think in the end, whenever I do decided to stand up for what I believe is right, it will come from inside me. And when this does happen, I really really hope I don't start crying hysterically!
As far as college goes, I'm on my way. I was accepted to Brenau University, and as long as I can get enough scholarships to afford it, I'll be there next fall. I have classes with a lot of different people this year. People who I never thought I would be able to call my friend. It turns out those who I have doubted in the past are actually extremely smart, and one girl actually wants to be a mass communication major just like me. It's amazing how people can shock you in the end.
I know that I'm going to be a basket case by the end of this year. Adam had his last day at work yesterday, and it was pretty emotional for me. Just imagine how I'm going to be at graduation! I hate being at that point in life where you become so close to people and then they seem to leave so quickly. Adam told me that
I restored his faith in humanity for people of my generation. If that isn't something huge to say then I don't know what is! He went on about how I have such a great attitude on life, and I was just standing there thinking, "What? You don't know me at all!"
I've reached the decision that teenagers only like to think they are depressed. It lets them have sympathy for themselves, which somehow makes them feel better. It makes me mad though. You're life isn't stressful. It isn't hard. You only have the right to say that if you've lost everything. That's what Katrina has taught me.
Saturday is my last day at work. Yep, the job that I once loved has completely changed. It's almost as if my job was like a summer camp. It was so much fun in the summer, and I loved it so much! Of course now I have to worry about passing human anatomy (
why is it always scinece that I'm horrible at?) and I just don't have the time to do my homework if I have to work all weekend considering that most of the homework that I get is stuff that I have to do on the weekend. Why I get most of my homework on the weekend, I have no idea.
Teachers are meanAnyway, I'll try to write more often. Till then, have fun, and don't let things get to you too much ... it's not worth it ... trust me.
-JKM-OUT!
